Do you really want a cat? a dog? a kid? Or would you rather have a new video card for your computer? Let's compare...
Herewith, a rundown of the relative merits of four options for the computer enthusiast - a kitten, a puppy, a baby, and (as a representative example of the more usual kind of home information technology purchase) a new video card.
New video card
(assuming case dust filters are effective)
|Buries own dung||Yes||No||No||N/A|
(unless cooling fan bearings are failing)
|Multiple rendering pipelines||No||No||No||Yes|
|Can be shut up in kitchen overnight||Yes||Yes||Yes, until someone finds out||Sure, if you like|
|Climbs screen doors||Yes||No||No||No|
|Likes to eat bugs||Yes||Yes||Yes||No|
|Number of favourable scores:||11||6||2||3|
Clearly, and despite competing opinions, a kitten is substantially preferable to a puppy. It's also, incidentally, obvious that a new video card is 1.5 times as desirable as a baby. In their favour, babies can be made at home and offer superior resale value. The kitten, however, is obviously the better option.